Gain confidence in handling conflict, criticism and other challenging situations. Put together a list of training and key accomplishments. Learn how to build trust, credibility and rapport fast and effectively. Therefore, working on yourself is the best thing you can do to increase your assertiveness naturally. Fogging is a useful technique if people are behaving in a manipulative or aggressive way. Much like the name suggests, the broken record technique suggests that we act like a broken record - where the record gets . This is why people naturally become more assertive as they grow older. See more about the positive and negative enquiry technique by reading the article The Positive and Negative Enquiry Technique. Do not pressure for an answer right away; agree to a future meeting. Before you continue, you might like to download our three Resilience Exercises for free. Assertiveness training: A forgotten evidence-based treatment. Non-Assertiveness A non-assertive person is one who is often taken advantage of, feels helpless, takes on everyone's problems, says yes to inappropriate demands and thoughtless requests, and allow others to choose for him or her. Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. People often struggle with responding to praise and compliments, especially those with lower self-esteem as they may feel inadequate or that the positive comments are not justified. It is important to give positive feedback to others when appropriate but also to react appropriately to positive feedback that you receive. But that rarely happens in the real world. Rather than arguing back, fogging aims to give a minimal, calm response using terms that are placating but not defensive, while at the same time not agreeing to meet demands. No one likes someone else invading their space. The third option is ideal because it takes care of the above risk. Your email address will not be published. You can find competent specialists who are affiliated with local universities or mental health facilities or who are listed on the websites of professional organizations. Your family doctor may be able to refer you to a competent professional. Nonverbal behavior refers to the style of com munication: eye contact, posture, tone and volume of speech, interpersonal distance, and listening. The LADDER mnemonic is an effective way of assertively resolving problems. Assertiveness Skills for Managers - Objectives. Let me finish this first. (, This work will take a lot of time because (. 10. Some of these hints I have discovered myself (painfully, by trial-and-error), most of them not. Make sure you do take on their work later or theyll think youre manipulative. Fogging Fogging is a useful technique if people are behaving in a manipulative or aggressive way. Assertiveness and self-confidence are valued commodities in the workplace and essential to good leadership (Gallo, 2012). Be grateful, appreciative, and apologize when appropriate. With no fuel, the other person begins to change their approach towards us and likely becomes calmer and more assertive themselves. 2. Assertiveness is a communication style that lies midway between two other extreme communication styles- passiveness and aggressiveness. As a communication style, assertiveness means using the right words, voice tones and body language. Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors. One, called the broken-record technique, is useful for situations in which another person will not acknowledge or accept your message. But in most conflicts, being assertive is the optimal strategy. It is expected that competent therapists hold advanced academic degrees. Of course I'm annoyed, I've been waiting for ages. Ask the group to imagine a new day, then answer the following questions: Ask the group to discuss how being more assertive in the new day would feel and what they could achieve. Protecting the ego is an important task for the mind. The skills acquired in assertiveness training are valuable for both our personal and professional lives, enabling us to find ways to (Shaw, 2020): Assertive communication has two crucial and overlapping skills: verbal and nonverbal (Williams, 2020). Sure, only saying, Could you turn down the volume? wouldve given him the power of choice, but he might still have considered it too big a favour. No matter how you attend your course, we will always ensure it's interactive and engaging. Assertive responses promote fairness and equality in human interactions, based on a . We we have to believe that we deserve to get our needs met if we are then going to be able to stand up . The Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies (ABCT) is an interdisciplinary organization committed to the advancement of a scientific approach to the understanding and amelioration of problems of the human condition. Positive enquiry is a simple technique for handling positive comments such as praise and compliments. Its because they value themselves enough to value their own opinions, feelings, and needs. Assertiveness Skills. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. When youre trying to be assertive, really the only enemy you have to fight is the other persons perception that youre stepping on their rights (i.e. Instead, giving reasons for your No is a better strategy. The opposite of positive enquiry is negative enquiry. Negative enquiry is a way to respond to more negative exchanges such as receiving criticism. This 1-day Assertiveness Training course is designed to help candidates explore and gain an understanding of the issues associated with not being assertive, and the benefits of being assertive in a workplace environment. This is different from an aggressive response that may have been: "How dare you, I spent all afternoon preparing that meal" or "Well that's the last time I cook for you". Take an Exercise from Actors 9. Use assertive language. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. In addition, therapists help to identify beliefs and attitudes the clients may have developed that lead them to become too passive. "Early basic research suggests that assertiveness problems are common among externalizing disorders, such as depression and anxiety, as well as nonclinical problems such as self-esteem and relationship satisfaction, making assertiveness a construct that may play a central role in the maintenance of clinical problems. Step D. Define Criteria for Measuring Change in Assertive Behavior. Best wishes to all your endeavors. Use moral judgment in decision making. Home Tips and techniques Assertiveness training: Practical assertiveness guide. It's designed to support the assertiveness skills and strategies explored in the Be Assertive e-learning course. Used to provide the live chat functionality on our website and save your conversations, Used to speed up the website user experience, Used to track your visits to our website to improve layout. The bully gets his or her own way. Manage your Membership information, email preferences, and more. 2. A way of acting: like smoking less or being more outgoing; Still, youre the one who ended the conversation. It helps you keep people from taking advantage of you. The second of our assertiveness techniques is the fogging technique. Mind Tools Club members can read about it in our Skillbook, Assertiveness. Have you ever been to a party and found yourself avoiding someone because you didnt know what to say? Each person takes a turn refusing or declining the other persons request. Try out some of the techniques along with the worksheets. Talented leaders must balance the input and needs of their followers while still ensuring the collective meets [], Few, if any, reasonable adults expect to be bullied after school, but thats exactly what is happening in the workplace. There is no point in being assertive if you dont know what you want. The positive and negative enquiry technique has 2 different responses positive and negative which are more commonly known as positive enquiry and negative enquiry. The third option works because it effectively removes you and your boss from the problem. However, dont beg for justice as that way youll lose your power, deepening the power gap, and giving them room to exploit you more if theyre evil. Fogging involves agreeing with any truth that may be contained within statements, even if critical. Assertiveness allows individuals to assert their personal rights without undermining the rights of others.Assertiveness is considered a balanced response, being neither passive nor aggressive, with self-confidence playing an important part. An assertive person responds as an equal to others and aims to be open in expressing their wishes, thoughts and feelings. Confidence and Self Esteem Confidence and strong self esteem are necessary if we are to become assertive. One party feels violated, and the conflict escalates. By clicking Accept All, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. This technique should be sued with caution and at the right time. 1 Day. The bullying dominant behaviour is rewarded, and so it persists. Gallo, A. As an emotion, it means having the right level of self-confidence. All courses run from 9:30 am to 4:30 pm, with plenty of breaks. A way of feeling: like helping a person to be less scared, less depressed, or less anxious; Our Assertiveness Skills Training Course in Dublin will provide you with the skills and approaches to communicate more confidently with others. Assertiveness can be defined as communication in which one expresses oneself in a direct and honest manner in interpersonal situations, while simultaneously respecting the rights and dignity of others. Ask if a compromise can be reached. This is because this can be a tactic that leads to committing to doing something because we now feel obliged to do so. Saying no is never easy, but there are techniques that can help. Continue to: I bought these shoes last week and the heels have fallen off. IP address and other personal details are not recorded. If the meeting goes poorly, you may need to consider your future with the company and whether it is worthwhile exploring other opportunities. Therapists help clients figure out which interpersonal situations are problems for them and which behaviors need the most attention. Youre breaking off the conversation and taking their power to choose when to end the conversation. Dealing with Non-Assertive Behaviours, See also: When we interact with people, were also assessing them as allies or enemies.2. Say what you mean as clearly as possible. That meal was practically inedible, I can't remember the last time I ate something so awful, It wasn't the best, exactly what didnt you like about it?. You have the right to judge your own behaviour, thoughts, and emotions, and to take the responsibility for their initiation and consequences upon yourself. Have you ever realized, after the fact, that you had been unfairly criticized or taken advantage of? In addition to teaching specific assertiveness skills, the therapist can work with clients to help reduce anxiety and worry through systematic desensitization, rational-emotive behavior therapy, or other techniques. youre being their enemy). THANK YOU VERY MUCH INDEED for this excellent article! Your task in being assertive while disagreeing with someone is to make up for that slight power loss that they might feel. Instead, youre acknowledging it and even emphasizing it over your own small work. Websites like. Assertiveness is a manner of communicating and a relational style used by individuals to express their needs confidently, openly, and in a positive manner. Finally, assertiveness training is based on the idea that assertiveness is not inborn, but is a learned behavior. What are the five steps in assertiveness training? Base decisions on facts by keeping emotions in check. If you don't get what you want the first time you ask, don't give up. Reduce stress and gain clarity in interactions by knowing what to accept and when to say no.. 4 Assertiveness Techniques You Can Use Every Day, Leadership and Management Training Courses, The Positive and Negative Enquiry Technique. Youre not showing that youre incompetent (giving up your power) and youre not accusing your boss (taking away their power). Putting in place beliefs and thoughts that support assertiveness can make saying no more manageable. It removes their ego from the situation. Step E. Identifying Mistaken Traditional Assumptions and Countering Them With Assertive Rights. Facial expression: important to not express anger or anxiety. These engaging, science-based exercises will help you deal effectively with difficult circumstances and give you the tools to improve the resilience of your clients, students, or employees, helping them become more assertive. Language & Concepts. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. In a way, assertiveness training, which uses a variety of cognitive-behavioral techniques, can be conceptualized as a component of social skills training, which broadly aims to help individuals reduce any anxiety-based inhibitions and learn specific skills to develop more competent social functioning. Step C. Learn To Distinguish Between the Three Modes of Communication. Its imposing your decision on them, which is disempowering. When youre being assertive, you gain power, but not enough that you become aggressive. Positive enquiry is used to find out more details about the compliment or praise given, and agree with it: You made an excellent meal tonight, it was delicious!, Thanks. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These aims are achieved through the investigation and application of behavioral, cognitive, and other evidence-based principles to assessment, prevention, and treatment. The bill of assertive rights is 10 things that highlight the freedoms we have to be ourselves without disrespecting others. Our Assertiveness Training in Leeds will help you; Become more assertive at work. Assertiveness is a skill, and like any other, can benefit from practice. When used correctly, the fogging technique aims to reduce further confrontation by quashing it and not providing more fuel to escalate it. Instead, by providing reasons you make the problem 100% objective. The Knowing When to Speak Upworksheet asks a series of questions to help you decide whether this is the right time to speak up about something or not. The next sentence is slightly rude and hence, even more disempowering. The bill of assertive rights is 10 things that highlight the freedoms we have to be ourselves without disrespecting others. Positive Enquiry used for handling positive comments, praise and compliments, Negative Enquiry used for handling negative comments, feedback or criticism. In this article, we introduce assertiveness training and share some techniques, tips, and tools to help your client become more assertive without falling into the trap of aggression. Hand gestures should be chosen, controlled, and reinforce the point you are making. Making your wants and needs known to others without being pushy or demanding. Valuing and respecting the rights, feelings, and opinions of others. Feel free to contact me if you have a query. Behaving assertively can help you: Gain self-confidence and self-esteem Gain a sense of empowerment Understand and recognize your feelings Earn respect from others Improve communication Gain highly effective assertiveness techniques. Our relationships with other people are also likely to suffer because we may become resentful when they dont read our minds for what we are not assertive enough to be telling them. In fact, assertiveness can be thought of as a middle point between passivity and aggression. Youre working from home and a family member suddenly asks you to do something for them. Hi, Im Hanan Parvez (MBA, MA Psychology), founder and author of PsychMechanics. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". The use of material found at skillsyouneed.com is free provided that copyright is acknowledged and a reference or link is included to the page/s where the information was found. Okay, this is a fairly common one. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Get your message across with confidence. According to Dr. Gary Namie [], Chamber of Commerce (KvK) Registration Number: 64733564, 6229 HN Maastricht, 2022 PositivePsychology.com B.V. In the most conventional sense, youre being assertive in expressing how you feel, but in terms of power dynamics, youre creating a power imbalance. Adopting assertive body language and verbal communication is essential, as are timing and being committed to your response. Being assertive is a matter of practicing certain communication skills and having the right inner attitude. Assertiveness training: Practical assertiveness guide, Furrowed eyebrows in body language (10 Meanings), How to detach from someone you love deeply, Say you disagree with their idea + explain why you disagree. Before you ask for something, consider why you want it (Hill, 2020). Why People are Not Assertive Use this self-study workbook to help you boost your assertiveness. You can work through the entire course, or, because we know how busy life can be, you have the option to go straight to particular skills you'd like to work on. Using words like small and little reassures them you arent throwing their request straight out of the window. It improves communication skills which will help you improve your self esteem and gain the respect of others. As assertiveness should be encouraged in others it is also important to remember that we should always respect the thoughts, feelings, opinions and beliefs of other people. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. A lack of assertiveness can leave you feeling like you are no longer living your own life and are nothing more than a puppet, at the mercy of others desires. What time do you call this? Empathic assertion. First, Ill briefly explain what assertiveness means, and then Ill dive into the underlying dynamics of assertive interactions. Start with the small stuff, and you will be more ready when bigger challenges are presented (Williams, 2020). While youre working, he comes to your desk and assigns you another task. When using the fogging technique, we show that we agree with anything that is true in what the other person is saying to us. Related Information. assertiveness training is to maximize the number of context in which an individual is able to communicate assertively. So how do you go about doing this power re-adjustment? Its important that when someone gives us a compliment or praise we test why they are doing this. I mentioned earlier that refusing to comply with someone is taking away their power. How and when to use assertive communication skills. Trying to be assertive is not always the same as being assertive. Step B. Book time with your boss and let them know what you would like to discuss. Become our own master and avoid being trampled on. Assertiveness is a communication style that lies midway between two other extreme communication styles- passiveness and aggressiveness. If they challenge your request, remain calm while presenting other reasons or examples. I had a hard time believing someone could be this inconsiderate, and it took me a while to come up with a perfect assertive sentence. Assertive skills Sudheer Nadukuditi. How to Complain, Effectively Its why criticism feels bad and why one needs to do enough mental work before they can develop the ability to handle disagreements. The broken record technique is an approach that can be used when we are being assertive. Repeat the point in a non-confrontational way. I enjoy having coffee with you, but I have other plans this evening.. Rather than appearing aggressive, say, I feel, I think, etc. As such, these training materials are suitable to train people who are either too . Intervention developers should create programs that involve classroom teaching and provide participants with opportunities for practice, either through simulation or role-play. The client and therapist then switch roles, and the client practices the new behavior. Many people feel they lack assertiveness, and they want to know how to . It will provide you with the tools and skills you need to think and act more assertively. You dont express your needs to your partner and feel subdued by them. You feel youve been wronged i.e. Thank them for taking the time to meet you, and then discuss what you are hoping for and the reasons that you deserve the raise. Option 2 is outright refusal which in itself disempowering. By understanding your assertiveness (or lack thereof), you can identify where development is needed, using the worksheets as your guide. Understand Your Hierarchy of Needs 2. assertive enough, or come across as too assertive, the following exercises will guide you through what high quality assertiveness looks like and how you can apply these skills in your personal and professional relationships HEE Assertiveness Workbook Compiled by: Trevor Bibic (May 2020) When youre being passive or submissive, you give up your power. By the end of this workshop attendees will be able to; Identify the personal blockages preventing assertive behaviour with reports and peers. Life is full of lessons, an ongoing masterclass in the human condition. Get down to the single point or issue. Assertiveness training: A forgotten evidencebased treatment. Get your message across with confidence. When someone compliments us or gives us praise, we should ask for specifics so we can continue to do what led to the positive comments. I cant take up more work. (, This is taking too much time. Verbal behavior is the content of a communication in other words, what is actually said. There are no hard-and-fast rules of what assertive behavior is; rather, it is specific to the particular time and situation. Keep a Written Role-Playing Journal 6. Assertiveness must be present in what you have to say (Williams, 2020): There are many techniques that you can use or share with your clients that will help them be assertive without becoming aggressive. Its a power contest where each party tries to one-up the other by disagreeing with them, often harshly. Assertiveness training can also be useful for those who wish to improve their interpersonal skills and sense of self-respect. The 5 assertiveness training methods or approaches which are set out in the eBook are: 1. You can learn more about the fogging technique, how to apply it and some examples of how to use it by reading the article The Fogging Technique. One way to stop procrastinating and deal with situations that require you to be assertive is to approach them with positive emotions. This Assertiveness Skills Training course in Northern Ireland is designed for those who struggle to express themselves assertively, including people with passive & aggressive communication styles. Well quote an all-inclusive price for in-house and bespoke work. Reflect on each of the questions in the Assertiveness Self-Evaluation Exerciseto understand better how assertive you are. Becoming more assertive can be helped by understanding yourself better and building the skills you need (Murphy, 2011). The Bill of Assertive Rights The Fogging Technique The Positive and Negative Enquiry Technique The Broken Record Technique The Bill of Assertive Rights The first of our assertiveness techniques is the Bill of Assertive Rights. Ive got my own stuff to deal with. (, Shall I finish this task Im working on first? (, Im already stressed out by all this work youve given me. Possible problem areas: Giving compliments Making requests, eg. Discuss the following guidelines to see how having a positive mindset can help: Sometimes taking a deep breath and focusing on what is really being said, rather than what you expect to hear, can be a powerful technique for growth and development. This is because assertiveness automatically increases your power. Clarify the difference between assertiveness and aggression. There are lots of different assertiveness techniques out there, some tried and tested and others that people have developed themselves that work for them. You have the right to say, I dont know. Are you incompetent? It is the attitude that you are worth what others are worth, as well as a set of skills to implement the attitude. People dont like to hear a No. The positive and negative enquiry technique is a skill used when someone provides us with a compliment or praise, or when someone provides us with negative feedback or criticism. These are examples of situations that involve assertive behavior. The broken record technique. Knowing yourself better can help build your assertiveness (Hill, 2020). This then gives them the fuel (or reason) to continue to be aggressive. When there is a misunderstanding, correct it calmly and rationally. And if they do, it's their problem, not yours. The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. In contrast, aggressive behavior occurs when you force your own needs on others. Cognitive Behavioral Analysis System of Psychotherapy (CBASP) identifies patients with chronic depression as having little awareness of their impact on others, the perception of a lack of control, and feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. In the past, assertiveness training has typically been split into two specialties (Speed et al., 2018): Assertiveness training currently receives limited research attention, yet a search online and the popularity of assertiveness books suggest its importance to the general population. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". The key is to stay calm, be very clear in what you want, stick to the point and not give up. If they still do not agree to the raise, ask what you can do to increase your chances in the future. Negative enquiry follows the same process but we ask for more details of the negative feedback or criticism. Assertiveness offers many benefits. One lesson common to humanity is how to negotiate conflict skillfully. Assertiveness is both an attitude and a set of acquired skills. Lecture 6 assertiveness (1) 2 The Next Experience. Working in small groups, two experienced facilitators use game-play, role-play and other experiential processes to get each individual to see exactly what is possible for them in order to feel better about themselves and their situation. Listen Actively. Assertive communication can strengthen your relationships by reducing stress from conflict and providing you with social support when facing difficult times. 3. Assertiveness Skills Training Course -. The How to Get What You Deserve in Life worksheet asks a series of questions to help you understand and obtain what you want out of life (modified from Hill, 2020). Therapists take into account the clients particular cultural context in this process. When you can listen to what someone else is saying and understand their point of view, you can start to look at things differently. General Techniques of Assertiveness Two key techniques that can aid assertiveness are known as "Fogging" and the "Stuck Record" technique. Goals are motivating, encourage us to learn more, and help us develop. Another technique, sometimes called fogging, is a method for denying requests or disagreeing with someone while showing them that you nevertheless recognize and respect that persons position. He turned the volume down significantly and a few minutes later, fully. But everyone can improve. How do you express your disagreement? A way of dealing with physical or medical problems: like lessening back pain or helping a person stick to a doctors suggestions. I really wanted to say something like, You inconsiderate moron, dont you have earphones? but I knew thatd be aggressive. Assertiveness Treatment begins with documenting instances in which assertion is lacking and analyzing interpersonal issues for deficits. Without realizing it, you may be displaying aggression. This page details some ways that both passive and aggressive communication can be reduced and replaced with assertive communication, which in turn will lead to more positive interpersonal interactions. See our page: Assertiveness in Specific Situations for more information. Once clients understand the importance of assertive behavior for their situation, therapists help them develop more assertive behaviors. Being assertive can help us to feel better about ourselves - improving self-esteem and personal confidence. Hence, being assertive is this delicate power re-adjustment task that requires advanced social skills. The relationship between expressed social fears and assertiveness and its treatment implications. I strongly believe the little you have to remember, the better. The therapist gives supportive, honest feedback after each role-play exercise in order to help the client improve his or her skills. When you feel your rights have been taken away or that youve been dealt with unfairly, you can behave in one of the three ways: For example, if you feel like your boss isnt paying you as much as youre worth, you might yell at them and demand a raise (aggressive), or you can explain why you deserve a raise (assertive) or you can avoid asking for a raise (passive/submissive). Warmth and competence as universal dimensions of social perception: The stereotype content model and the BIAS map. Its okay to say no. You may feel pressured to comply and do what others ask, even if it feels uncomfortable, but you have permission to refuse (Speed et al., 2018). Assertiveness Skills Training Overview. The Self-Assessment for Assertiveness Self-Discoveryworksheet asks a series of questions to get to know yourself and your assertiveness better. Be direct without being rude. You respond, Im sorry you feel warm, but Ive got on a sweater and long underwear, and Im still freezing. Lets now look at some real-life examples that call for assertive behavior: Having disagreements is one of the most common situations that call for assertive behavior. Learning Objectives - At the end of the course delegates will be able to: Identify the difference between assertive, aggressive and passive communication and determine their own preference. Below are the five very effective steps in assertiveness training; Step 1: It involves repeating what you want, time and time again, without raising the tone of your voice, becoming angry, irritated, or involved in side issues. Disagreements turn into arguments for precisely the same reason. Think of realistic situations, either in the past or future, such as: I was already overloaded when asked to pick up more work. If youve been a reader here, you know I like boiling things down to their essence. The dominant bullying behaviour is effectively reinforced by the response given by 'secure' and 'non-assertive' people to bullying. In his book When I say no, I feel guilty, Manuel J Smith first proposed the ten-point Bill of Assertive Rights, all based around one key principle: The right to be the final judge of yourself is the prime assertive right which allows no one to manipulate you. Task minimization took care of that. The former appeals to their sense of fairness and the latter to their sense of competitiveness. Create a Vision Board 3. I am a strong, confident, and effective communicator. I am a people-pleaser and I really struggle to say no. Assertive Aggressive General Compliant, submissive, talks little, vague non-committal communication, puts self down, praises others "I don't mindthat's fine.yes alright" Actions and expressions fit with words spoken, firm but polite and clear messages, respectful of self and others "That's a good idea, and how about if we did this Everything you have shared here. 305 7th Avenue, 16th Fl., New York, NY 10001, ABCT Task Force for Equity, Inclusion, and Access, Information on Opioids and the Opioid Crisis, Training in Evidence Based Behavioral Practice, Cognitive and Behavioral Practice Journal, Gaining Experience While in Graduate School, 2021 Virtual Convention November 16 21, 2021, 2020 Virtual Convention November 19 22, 2020, Shyness, Social Anxiety Disorder, and Social Phobia. The risk in being assertive almost entirely lies in going too far and taking away too much of the other persons power. Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. Learn to think about your responses and how you behave when you communicate with others. Being assertive in the workplace Getting your point across Presenting clear messages Ending conversations Gaining confidence Tools Dealing with difficulty Handling difficult people and situations The art of saying no Managing conflict Moving forward Emotional intelligence Managing your emotions Dealing with someone else's emotions Show more If you or someone you know might benefit from assertiveness training, it is important to find a therapist or counselor who is an expert with this approach. In a group setting, discuss how to ready yourself for assertiveness at the beginning of the day. I work with a range of people who manipulate and make saying no very difficult, while also over-loading me with tasks they dont want to do. Assertive communication has two crucial and overlapping skills: verbal and nonverbal (Williams, 2020). When we dont feel like we can express ourselves openly, we may become depressed, anxious, or angry, and our sense of self-worth may suffer. Imagine that you are returning something that is faulty to a store.The conversation may go as follows. 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